The Bookworm’s Second Life
Clarissa
애독자의 갱생 라이프 Jun 18, 2026 38 views
Chapter 25
I had a nightmare.
The master I had served all my life, the one I believed I would serve until my death, had abandoned me.
He said that because I returned with a sullied body, because the world pointed fingers at me, and because the king was talking about disgrace and how he would never forget the humiliation brought upon his house—he ordered me to “go and die.”
“I lived for you and killed for you. And now you tell me to die for you?”
Everything felt denied.
I wanted to cry, but I had forgotten how.
Only the methods of holding back tears remained, only the habit of gritting my teeth and enduring.
I had trained myself to endure everything for that noble master.
To the point where it became natural.
“Still… if it’s a dream… that’s lucky. Lucky…”
When I open my eyes, everything will be as usual.
I will greet him, and he will smile at me.
Everything will return to how it always was.
“…What the f***. A dream.”
At the feeling of pressure pressing on her forehead, Rishikida slowly opened her eyes.
“…Where is this…?”
This was not her quarters.
It was far more spacious, far more luxurious, and above all, not Nudia’s style.
With a faint sense of dread, Rishikida slowly sat up.
‘So it wasn’t… a dream.’
Yes. None of it had been a dream.
Being abandoned by her master. Being ordered to die. Being captured by the enemy.
Even the image of the young man who had thrown a sword in front of her—none of it was a dream.
“Stop wasting time and get up. Because of you, I can’t even leave this place. What a mess.”
A cold voice rang out.
Rishikida slowly turned her head.
Beside her sat a man with a sulky expression.
“Just in case I have to say it—I didn’t touch a single strand of your body. I had someone I know move you to my room. And I almost got beaten to death by that lady because of it. Seriously, it hurt like hell, damn it…”
It wasn’t a joke—Shion had truly almost been beaten to death by Lilith.
First, he did something close to suicide, then suddenly showed up asking ridiculous things: clinging to knights and acting weird, then moving a female knight into his room.
“Yeah, sure. You want to die? I’ll kill you myself! Do you even understand how possessive a succubus queen is?! I’ve been stressed enough because of that Lucia or whatever woman!! You idiot!”
He got beaten for nearly an hour.
Shion now somewhat understood why his father once muttered while lighting a cigarette, “Marriage is best left as late as possible. You can date anytime, but marriage is never ‘anytime.’”
Of course, he was immediately knocked down by his mother afterward.
“…What do you mean by that, Sir Shion? Why am I in your room…?”
“You collapsed suddenly. Someone who knows healing said you probably pushed yourself too hard after the first battle ended and came straight here without rest.”
“……”
“And they also said you looked like you’d been beaten indiscriminately.”
Rishikida stayed silent.
Shion shrugged and continued.
“I gave you until midnight. Think of it as a day’s grace period.”
“A grace period…?”
“You said you wanted to die. But couldn’t bring yourself to actually do it. A knight afraid of a sword or blood? That doesn’t make sense. So there’s only one answer—you’re unsure whether you truly want to die or not.”
Rishikida tried to say something, then closed her mouth.
“From now until midnight. Decide before then. If you decide, I’ll give you your sword back. Or you can jump into the moat, whatever. Actually, that’s annoying for the soldiers to retrieve your body, so don’t. I’ll just pick a place for you to die and arrange cremation. But if you can’t decide by midnight, I’ll throw you out. Go die outside. The Clauzen house doesn’t kill people who want to live, but we don’t kill people who ask to be killed either.”
Cold. Harsh beyond cold.
Rishikida nodded.
Either way, the result was already decided.
Even if she chose, or didn’t choose, she would die.
A knight without a master had no reason to exist.
“Anyway, I’ve got somewhere to go.”
Shion stood up.
“Huh?”
“Are you not coming?”
“Excuse me? I…?”
“You’re a prisoner, not a corpse reservation. And I’m the one watching you. So you’re coming with me today, whether you like it or not. Understand?”
It sounded absurd, but it was true that leaving a prisoner alone was not an option.
And above all, the idea that this might be her last day made her stand up without thinking.
Spending the last day sitting alone would drive her mad.
Better to keep her mind occupied.
“Then let’s go.”
Shion opened the door.
A knight on guard bowed immediately.
Rishikida followed behind, but no one stopped her.
“…Where are we going?” she finally asked.
Shion kept walking without answering.
“Why does a prisoner care about that? No, wrong question. Why does someone about to die care?”
“That is…”
She couldn’t answer.
“You’ll see. The hospital.”
“…Huh?”
“The battle yesterday was a mess. Of course I’m going to check on the wounded soldiers. A guy in a position of authority who doesn’t show his face after sending so many people into war—what kind of person is that?”
Shion’s expression looked unusually dark.
To Rishikida, at least.
Inside his mind, Shion was thinking:
Damn it, it hurts like hell… that succubus queen…
Even as a demon, Lilith was ridiculously strong.
And Shion, who had no mana or physical enhancement, could only curl up and endure.
At the hospital, soldiers immediately recognized him.
“Ah, Sir Shion!”
Everyone tried to stand.
“Hey! Don’t get up, your wounds will burst! Stay down!”
One soldier even had blood splatter when he tried to rise too quickly.
“Seriously, stay down! You’re injured, act like it!”
Laughter spread lightly despite everything.
“Hey, Jimmy Faker.”
“Y-yes, sir…”
“How’s your body?”
“I’m fine. I expected this much.”
“Expected my foot. If you want to survive, think about survival, not dying.”
“I will remember that.”
Shion patted his shoulder and moved on.
Rishikida quietly watched him.
A noble heir of a great house… acting like this?
Talking casually with soldiers, joking, treating them as equals.
It didn’t feel like a noble.
It felt like a soldier.
“Stop staring blankly.”
“…Ah.”
“Follow me. We’ve got a busy day.”
And so she followed.
He met people, attended to matters, comforted the wounded, and even attended funerals, bowing sincerely.
Everything felt unfamiliar.
At least to Rishikida, this was not how nobles acted.
‘What is this man…?’
The rumors said he was a spoiled fool.
But the man in front of her was nothing like that.
He wasn’t a noble.
He was closer to the kind of “master” she had once dreamed of.
“…Shell.”
“……”
“Rishikida Amshel!”
“Y-yes! Knight Rishikida Amshel!”
She shouted her formal introduction without thinking.
“…What are you doing?”
“Ah. S-sorry, sir.”
“Anyway, I have to see my father. Go back to my room and wait.”
“Yes, understood.”
“Have you decided?”
“Huh?”
Shion sighed.
“Don’t tell me you didn’t realize the time. It’s already evening. Decide.”
Rishikida finally realized the day had nearly ended.
She had been too focused on watching him.
“Go think. You’re a prisoner, not my subordinate.”
At the word subordinate, she flinched.
She didn’t know why.
Why it felt like something inside her had dropped.
She walked into his room.
The room felt better than a prison cell for thinking.
She sat down.
A single day should have been enough to erase everything she felt.
But instead, it had grown stronger.
“Why am I thinking like this…”
Was she not supposed to die?
Hadn’t her master ordered her to die?
“You’ve been abandoned, Rishikida Amshel. Completely.”
Shion’s words echoed in her mind.
Then—
Thud.
She accidentally knocked something over.
A notebook.
Inside it was a short poem:
“With a heart that sings to the stars I will love everything that is dying And the path given to me I will walk it.”
“Seriously, what is it? You keep giggling.”
Lilith tilted her head at Shion.
He had stopped by briefly, smiling as if anticipating something.
“…Ah, a trap card activated.”
And then—
“May I not be ashamed of anything as I look up at the sky until the day I die.” —Yoon Dong-ju, ‘Prologue’ (Soseo)
